drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize
