Plan B is the new Plan A
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize
