did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Randomize
