My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
