i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize
