This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
