I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Randomize
