Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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