Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize