yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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