i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Randomize
