I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
