Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize