Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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