What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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