If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
