Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
