This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize
