so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
