you guys were way drunker than both of me
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
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