3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
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