Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
