I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Randomize
