So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
You dont lie about slip and slides
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
