He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
they're like a gay fantastic four
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
