someone threw a dead crab at me
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
