you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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