LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize