the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
