I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
