Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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