Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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