I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
