And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
