I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Randomize
