I didn't shave. On purpose
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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