Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I want to walk on stilts...naked
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Randomize
