they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
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