Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
