it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
