i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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