So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
