Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
You're like the curious george of whores
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Floor bacon is actually really good
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
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