I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
