i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
