craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
The power of my boobs compel you
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
