i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
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