I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
tell me about the eggs
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
