I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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