All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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